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vacant territory - an ellipsis on a sentence i can't write lyrics

[verse]
tired of waking up on my bedroom floor
sweat and tears clogging all my pores
and i’m wondering why
i can’t be normal

little more hair on chest
no messages left on my machine
as if hearing your voice
should mean anything

and i promised that things would be different this time
but i lied. i always lie about my feelings+ i always try to hide
and i’m hung up on car rides, and late nights on my shelf. so i shouldn’t be here
it should be someone else+ but it’s not

i’m unfortunately me
i’m not the person you wanted me to bе
i break down every othеr week
every time i feel alright, i say something i don’t mean

i wanna drive to your place at 1 in the morning
and sit on that playground cause’ now nights are boring

i wish i had never said how i felt
i wanted to love you the same way i hated myself
sometimes i still miss you, but still hate you never
gave me some closure or answered as to why
and i’ve been trying this whole time to make it up to you
and apologize
but i’m a terrible representative
of a partner, watching the way that you live
it’s just heartburn
i’ll take much more than i give
i’m a monster
this is the end isn’t it?

and i know you’re still mad
sometimes you don’t ignore me
i’m not trying to be annoying
i’m just imploring

i’m sorry i worry about your health
i still learning i should love myself
trains blare in the nighttime
and i’m doing just fine
on my own

[verse]
the rain and fall and winter all remind me of you
that p+sses me off, cause i was just starting to forget about it
how many more times will i lose myself in you?
or have to hear about how you don’t give a sh+t?

[outro]
an ellipsis on a sentence i can’t write
you’ve been haunting me, every day and night
i’m tired of mentally fighting for my life
i just want to forget about your eyes

- vacant territory lyrics

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