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vannda - night thinker lyrics

i can’t sleep at night
keep having nightmares
‘cuz i only got a high school degree
my mom’s worried sick
that i might starve some day
she’s been working overtime
my heart’s about to break into pieces
father’s doing backbreaking work
kneel down to show respect to my parents;
father dropped me off at the taxi stand
gave me life advice
and reminded me to always make sure i ate
told me to be careful
and not trust others too easily other than brother dy
don’t drink too much
don’t smoke too much, father’s waiting for your trophy
uh, let me tell y’all my story
bеfore i made the history
this lifе is shaken up like a smoothie
flew everywhere to seek knowledge
my eyes became hazy
this life crosses continents
like an eagle flying across the world
i want my name to be heard like cashew
i want to be respected like chea li (buddhist’s son)
press my hands together and pray
the world is an ugly place, don’t you see?
or can you not see that
and only see my faults?
you were too cowardly
and now you’re watching me reach my goal
i can’t sleep at night
keep having nightmares
‘cuz i only got a high school degree
my mom’s worried sick
that i might starve some day
she’s been working overtime
my heart’s about to break into pieces
father’s doing backbreaking work
i don’t want to be apart from my parents
but my dreams make me think all night
i want to succeed, mama i tried
i don’t want to backtrack
my wings are fully formed, i fly
give me some time +
i follow through on what i say with no regrets
i await the day
that i understand what it means to worry
the day that i left home in 2016
there was a big rainstorm at night;
i curled up crying without a blanket
the night that i was very bold
i told mama please don’t worry
leave me to worry alone
a question without answer
i don’t know when
i could relieve you of your stuggles
let you take the rest that you deserve
i can’t afford to be a coward
you must be sick of giving me time
this is the essay that i conjured

- vannda lyrics

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