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vastum - abscess inside us lyrics

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first bliss stripped
she lost interest
couldn’t explain why
three years in
one year after he collapsed
vanished off the wagon

the ghost she left behind
decayed and grew
repelled us apart

one year passed
perpetual abandoning
dying and splitting

unbearable stench
a putrescent giant laughing
an abscess inside us
the crowd grew wild
dysfunction rewarded

he came in like a beast
charmed me frightened
but ego showed him the door

in disgust, i hurt him badly
i’ve never heard such pain
ego returns but everything’s changed
blaming all but herself

the beast returns
but this time shows himself the door
while a wagon’s passenger
hangs like a threat
as ego strokes herself
survivor keeps playing
through the scars
i gave him

and like a shadow she hovers like family
distant and demanding
s#d#stic crowd keeps growing
malicious adoration
in my confusion and complex grief
i have a long way to go
before i set myself free



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