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whitney avalon - you're not fooling anyone lyrics

cotton swabs are the ultimate safe and trusted first aid tool
cotton swabs are a versatile implement in every beauty school
cotton swabs are perfect for cleaning your baby or computer gear
warning: do not under any circ-mstances stick them in your ear

what? you’re not fooling anyone
n0body reads the fine print
n0body cleans their bathroom fixtures with a cotton swab
or uses it for picking up lint
the only reason people buy your product
is the thing you say should never be done
then it was pretty unwise to make it the just the right size for my ear c-n-l, guys
you’re not fooling anyone

mr. jeep in my right side mirror, way back where the roads converge
mr. jeep zooms past thirty cars who got here first to merge
mr. jeep, feigning innocence, flashes an apologetic grin
“i don’t understand how driving works, won’t you please let me cut in?”

ha! you’re not fooling anyone
this isn’t some kind of race
if i let you in it’s ’cause i am a saint
not because of your dumb pleading face
every single driver you just p-ssed here
knows you’re a slimy sneaky son of a gun
you really seem unconcerned, but even little kids learn to wait their godd-mned turn
you’re not fooling anyone

people who think horoscopes are science – please be joking!
people who leave phone books on my doorstep – what are you smoking?
people who misquote philosophers – clearly, honey, you’re no scholar!
people adding spires to skyscr-pers – that doesn’t really make it taller!
people who don’t change the toilet paper roll – sure you “didn’t see it”!
people who judge others all the time – you’re a jerk, i guarantee it! oh…

i’m not fooling anyone
n0body needs my advice
look, it’s mostly not my business what you choose to do
so i’ll just be respectful and nice
you’re ent-tled to your opinion
so don’t let me go and spoil your fun
and hey, i’m sure that we’d find that even all humankind can’t make you change your mind
i’m not fooling anyone
i’m not fooling anyone
i’m not fooling any— but seriously astrology is nonsense

- whitney avalon lyrics

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