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woody pond - dude, where's my car? lyrics

[intro]
my name is woody pond
and i am a below average rapper

[verse 1]
one question
are you or are you not the don?
call me when the cops are gone
took a strip of acid
found more s-ss in me than octagons
then i dressed like sherlock holmes
and went to comic-con
to solve the case of the missing chicken parmesan
my guess is it’s vader
i’ll blow some holes in some craters
explore the p-ssy in some waiters
[?]
rollin’ papers with painters, and players
p-ssin’ to strangers
and neighbors do favors for rangers in danger
let’s take [?] for the [?]
or the lakers
they both suck to me
last time that bazooka was out
that sorority didn’t f-ck with me
i’m not crying or complaining
i’m just saying societies [?]
i’m that loopy loser with lucy lu’s vodka mixed
in my juicy juice
[?]
suck like my shoes on juicy fruit
woah my brain just hit a loopty loop
it’s all good
every drink i drink is on the f-cking house like snoopy doo
yeah
woah

i just realized i’ve been staring at the same tapestry
for 20 minutes
i’m tripping on mescaline
and i just realized i’ve been dreaming of the same pretty catastrophe
she’s in my visions but she’s indifferent
and i’m an insistent pothead
and a hothead
i’m not dead, and i’m not ted
if you’re not feds then you’ve got bread
and that’s why i bred
if i ever snitch or be a rat, then i’mma drop dead
bet i’ll finally get a girlfriend when i drop bed
like young money i’mma rock beds
if she stops head
i might pop left
well that’s exaggerating

it’s the backwoods kings
a foxgang in a foxhole
we bake it out like a pothole
burnin’ blunts dark like charcoal
break the jolly roger on a flagpole
put your body in a manhole

if you starting acting froggy like f-cking grownup tadpole
[?] quit those -sshole
and i’m runnin’ real racks the three little rascals
just seize the castle
and spinnin’ [?]
flip that yay yo like my t-ssel
i left a bowl in my time capsule

so in fifty years when i wanna get baked and f-ck your granddaughter
i’ll dig it up
and pack it tight
before i k!ll the p-ssy

manslaughter
b-tch

- woody pond lyrics

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