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xac anon - solitude session lyrics

my little girl, where do i start?
from the moment of conception, you were carved in my heart
yet life’s cruel hand kept us apart
tore us away before i could even impart
the love i had, the dreams i charted
all shattered and scarred, now i’m deeply marred
your absence is a wound that never healed
a void in my life, a truth concealed
i missed your first laugh, your first cry
every moment stolen, a relentless goodbye
the photos i have, they’re all i hold
frozen memories, stories untold
i see your eyes, a reflection of mine
innocence shining, a fragile lifeline
but you grew up without my guiding hand
my absence a weight you couldn’t withstand
did you wonder why i never came?
was i a ghost, a forgotten name?
i’m haunted by the years we’ve missed
by the tender moments that never exist

i can’t undo the choices i made
the paths i walked yeah and the debts that i paid
but in my solitude, i still pray
that you’re surrounded by love, come what may
i hope life’s kinder to you than it was to me
that you find solace, and you feel free
for the pain i carry, it won’t subside
but for your happiness, i’ll swallow my pride
though i’m a shadow, lost in the night
i send my love, my whispers take flight
through the years, through the endless fight
i’ll be your guardian, hidden from sight
on tv screens, youtube, and storyfire’s glare
know my heart’s in those pixels, my soul laid bare
though life’s currents kept us in separate air
my love for you, my daughter, will always be there
in those virtual worlds, i’ll share my heart
feel my presence, my love, like a work of art

- xac anon lyrics

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