xtreme rap battles - ebeneezer scrooge vs the grinch lyrics
[verse 1: ebeneezer scrooge]
ebeneezer is here to spread some anti+cheer
i’m sick of putting up with you and christmas every year!
i won’t hear it from a guy whose only companion is his dog!
you know i’m on fire like a christmas yule log!
i make mincemeat out of toy stealing, green, little thugs!
you think that you can beat me? bah humbug!
so crawl back to your mountain where you’ve always been!
because the ghost of christmas future just told me that i win!
[verse 2: the grinch]
an old wrinkle thinks that he can beat me? hardly!
after this battle you’ll be deader than jacob marley!
how many versions of your movie can they possibly make?
at least one should be good! how many times does it take?
with my special we got it right the very first time!
i’m from a dr. seuss book, it’s not hard for me to rhyme!
i’ll take you now, and put you in my christmas cart!
my hatred for you grows 3 times bigger, just like my heart!
[verse 3: ebeneezer scrooge]
well, what even are you? an alien? a pet?
this christmas, a kick in your pants is all you’re gonna get!
you know i’ll win this battle, you can see i’m on a roll!
why, i wouldn’t even touch you with a 39 and a half foot pole!
[verse 4: the grinch]
i’m coming back to make this battle tight as my shoes!
speak clearly old man! you make less sense than the whos!
head back to the boarding school since your father made you go!
just try me, my disses are as cold as the snow!
[verse 5: ebeneezer scrooge]
my book was written by d+ckens and enjoyed by scholars!
everyone loves my book! yours is only read by toddlers!
put on some clothes! listen furball, have some decency!
you’re so ugly, i’m glad that i can barely see!
you think you’re bad cause you sneak in houses commiting small crimes?
in one night, i traveled through the sky and time!
be more like the whos! they’re singing and dancing!
have fun in your cave, now i’ll go back to my mansion!
[verse 6: the grinch]
i’ll rhyme a rap blizzard and blow down your house!
steal everything, even crumbs too small for a mouse!
you have no fashion sense, walking around in a night gown!
i’ve stolen gizmos and gadgets that were less tightly wound!
now right here, i’ll lyrically rip you apart limb by limb
until you look even more pathetic than tiny tim!
i’m a lean, mean, and green one! the worst you”e ever seen!
turn up your hearing aid so you know what i mean!
[verse 7: santa claus]
i’m santa claus now, but you can call me kris kringle!
my rhymes are gonna stun you, your whole bodies will tingle!
i’ll chop you down like a christmas tree, and hang you like an ornament!
and defeat both of you in this rap battle tournament!
i have to talk some sense into you ebeneezer!
stop acting like a crotchety, grumpy, stingy, old geezer!
grinch, your heart, head, or shoes, or whatever the reason
shouldn’t prevent you from enjoying my holiday season!
getting you to stop complaining, that is my goal!
so stop, or all you’ll get is a lousy lump of coal!
get over the fact that you’re on the naughty list!
now imma go! have yourselves, a merry litttle christmas!
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