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yuri khedz - in my head lyrics

throw all your stick and stones
but you won’t, won’t break my bones
tear me apart and spit me out
but i’m standing my ground
i won’t let you fool me again
i know this pain is all in my head

if i’m going through h+ll why the h+ll would i stop?
how am i feeling good when i know that i’m not
i think the pain is better than i thought
it makes me sane that i can be this strong
but i’m wrong
one more hit and i’m gone
vision fading and now i cannot just stop
wake up in the bed i’m shaking, tryna talk with god
tryna tell him i’m not the one who’s strong, i’m lost

maybe if i try to get wasted then
i’ll forget about my struggles and face them when
i’m sober the next day or later when
i realise who am i, man i’m breakin in

i break into my chest
to see why i’m a mess
is it becuz of heartbreak or less?
is it cuz of uncured ache on my chest
or is it cuz of life and the pain and all the regrets
you and i are quite the same in
how we deal with pain, but hey
i’m just a guy, who’s brain is
full of cries, now say this
“i’m alive but brainless
time to play this song
when you feel you’re lost

throw all your stick and stones
but you won’t, won’t break my bones
tear me apart and spit me out
but i’m standing my ground
i won’t let you fool me again
i know this pain is all in my head

the question that keeps poppin’ into my head
is if i can somehow find a way to use this mess
as a means to make money off me being depressed
give teens songs to deal with what they resent

an answer for this question you must give me
do we ever heal? or are we just busy

see now that i’ve convinced myself that i’m fine
i still store my trauma’s at the back of my mind
and i don’t know what to do while livin’ this life
all i know is that i’m different, i’m tired
i’m tired cuz i haven’t been fine for a while
am i
tryin’
to rise or will i deny
will i just lie
to myself in order to just slide
my pain away and act like i’m blind
i ain’t see no struggle
i seem so fine
but i look in the mirror and i see this light

i feel so empty
yet heart still heavy
i feel so numb
yet i feel it all at once
i’m a livin’ breathin contradiction
that never really wants to stop and listen

throw all your stick and stones
but you won’t, won’t break my bones
tear me apart and spit me out
but i’m standing my ground
i won’t let you fool me again
i know this pain is all in my head

- yuri khedz lyrics

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