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zach redler, sara cooper - who's the president of the united states? lyrics

[mother]
[verse 1]
why do i have to wear a paper gown to get my head examined?
the nurse with the lazy eye says “take off your clothes, put on this loose leaf, and sit.”
and after an hour, the doctor comes in and asks me “who’s the president of the united states?”
and i try to be nice. but honestly, who gives a sh+t?

who’s the president of the united states?
what kind of stupid question is that?
what do these doctors do in their medical schools?
just sit around, pick their nosеs, and get fat?
(spoken)
he’s prеtty fat!
(sung)
who’s the president of the united states?
what kind of question is that?
[verse 2]
why does it take the doctor an hour to look at you for two minutes?
if i was in charge, let me tell you, i’d make it so that it’s the doctor who waits
if i was in charge, oh boy, things would run a heck of a lot smoother
maybe i should be the president of the united states!

who’s the president of the united states?
what kind of a c+cked+up question is that?
do you want me to dance around a little too?
should i sing la cucaracha and put on a mexican hat?
what are those things called with the giant brim…
who’s the president of the united states?
what kind question is that?

[bridge]
(spoken)
this doctor is examining me and he doesn’t even listen to what i’m saying. i can explain the problem exactly. it’s easy to understand

(sung)
i imagine my mind as a series of cells
with clean white walls that are thick and tall
and each holding cell holds a piece of my past
one memory to every stall
but lately when i open a cell
just lately in the past few years
i see a flash when i open the door
and then a memory disappears!
[verse 3]
(spoken)
it’s probably some kind of deficiency in calcium, or something. that’s what these kind of things usually turn out to be

who’s the president of the united states?
what kind of horrible question is that?
i wonder why he’d ask such a thing
doctors are lousy at chitchat
(spoken)
they really are

(sung)
who’s the president of the united states?
what kind of question is that? he says that before he says h+llo
who’s the president of the united states?
what kind of question is that?
and why don’t i know?

why don’t i know?

- zach redler sara cooper lyrics

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