zander hall – my life my pain my hurt lyrics
(verse 1)
happy life when i was young
not fitting in with anyone
having talent but i let it slide
mommy told me
baby don’t cry
father told me
mommy wants to die
i wanna hide
i faded away
mommy tried to lie
now i feel the same
(verse 2)
got my first friend
when i moved
i moved because mommy left
i guess this is something new
she did not want me
she was not happy
now i feel this pain
tears are rushing outta me
(verse 3)
but the people i thought
that were my friends
ended up leaving and lying
and i restarted again
do they not understand
i can’t handle this
got a best friend
but we fight all the time
she knows my story
she knows i’m not fine
(verse 4)
waking up
wishing the same
that i have been for 6 years
but this life never change
she left one scar
made me wanna leave
got in my sister head
now hse says
my daughter is me
and i wish i could go away
(verse 5)
getting more friends
hiding in a corner
shoving them away
i don’t know what to do now
i’m not my former self
when i was little
i did not care
about what they thought
about my medusa hair
i never had a mom that would take care
that would help me
even when i’m scared
(verse 6)
cry all the time
i smile to hide
i say i’m alright
when my step mom asks me
why i wanna die
cover my face
don’t let them in
i know i’m a disgrace
now i am this thin
i have been starving myself
for three days now
(verse 7)
no one notices
i’m just a shadow
trust me i know this
i know i’m worthless
my mother proved it
she shows it real well
wish i could die
i attempted to die
i wish i could die
i attempted and tried
but i can’t say it went too well
(verse 8)
friend stopping me
saying i want attention
break all the mirrors
so no one will be missing
i promise i don’t want attention
i rather hide away
and see how they are not noticing
that i’m gone
no one sings along
or tells me i’m wrong
(verse 9)
tell me it’s just a phase
tell me i’m just a face
standing in the crown
is is over now
looking at the sky
seeing pain in my eyes
seeing no lies
seeing my soul die
and you wonder why
and i say cry
and she says for me to hold on
but i can’t when i remember these things
about my horrible mom
(verse 10)
so i die
away form this life
i will make it end
tell my friends
i can’t handle this
call me an attention wh0r- now
i don’t care go f-ck yourselves
you got nothing better to do
then showing me how to tie a noose
i can see how you want me dead
i can see how i got this far
father wants me to be like how i was
when i was younger
and smarter
and happier than i am now
this is my life song
and everybody feels my pain now
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