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a.yoni jeffries - ocd lyrics

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sometimes the pain doesn’t go away
we just find a new way to nurture it

i remember
i remember everything
your mumbling
your stuttering

i understand you were scared and got this cold, cold shoulder
turn your back on your daughter
to have kisses of your lover
i remember
my heart turned cold as december
i have high hopes
i know the moon glows in the dark during winter

i know you’ll say forgiveness is the way
what’s the price i paid to harbor this pain

i got this ocd
can’t sleep cus the cycles go constantly
ocd
to deal with the remnants of these memories
ocd
my mind is trapping me
ocd
but i’m living

i count everyday, all day
when i okay, when im afraid
everything, a pattern, a test and trial
and no one understands
when i try to get it out

i go… baseboards, window panes, eyes and ears
am i insane?
mailboxes, light post
man, am i a freak show?
toes, shoes, mops, brooms
eyelashes and rocks too
no one will understand it like i do

i got this ocd
can’t sleep cus the cycles go constantly
i got this ocd
to deal with the remnants of these memories
ocd
my mind is trapping me
ocd
but i’m living

i was present for the secrets
hush now, don’t let no one hear them
always been real good at their keepin’
until eventually i begin to feel it
i keep my feelings in
and people out
i never know where these thoughts go
can’t slow it down
not on my own

i got this ocd
can’t sleep cus the cycles go constantly
i got this ocd
to deal with the remnants of these memories
ocd
my mind is trapping me
ocd
but i’m living

- a yoni jeffries lyrics

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