abandoncy – i have your disease in me lyrics
i’m sitting here + a gulf between
the truth and bringing you relief
as you tell me + another body succumbs to
the cancer in our genes
just like the booze, just like the nicotine
it all wears off, runs out, to bleed into
another casket+funeral
render the familiar:
elegiac trope
…supine decay…
…fester stoic grace…
…just stay…
…a little more time…
…to convince myself
you’ve already died
ruminate on who’s to blame
pallbear your fading years
self+deceive carrying this weight
after the sun is laid down
i lie, inert on the wall
shadow play the sequences
convince myself of their mirth;
all those sordid and austere
so called better years
bleak in their afterglow
look worse in your dying days
i alone am to blame
for estranging me
and in the face of your death
i alone, am the one who left
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