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affinity drive - the weight of the world lyrics
with a right hook to the jaw life shook the see+saw
it’s alright
look at me, ma
look at my accomplishments
i often wish my oculus saw you sit amongst the audience
and if i thought i caught a glimpse it got my confidence lost within
but i learnt and built upon the consequence when i hopped the fence
then i dropped the lens and discovered:
i could see
the rain is gone
the sun blazes
love changes
best friends become strangers
as my mother and i would be
“blood makes the blade holy”
that’s what the dame told me as she scr+ped slowly across my spine
i thought the tightest grip might’ve slipped but she’s drawn the line
and love makes the pain cozy
i learned that too
i heard bad news
i burned gas fumes
i served dad clues
i worked back though my memory to remember these penalties
it ain’t our first rodeo
at this point, mentally, the worst knows my soul
so i go off to stroll slow and curse those that crow and won’t atone
got to pose this though: how many roads must a man walk down?
i can’t talk now
it’s too dim and dreary, clearly
it sincerely turned out nothing like i had hoped
some days it’s a fight
i can’t cope
life’s a bad joke and jehovah can’t hear me
until his hands steer me
so one could try to blame your sociopathic father who’d snort white lines
his insane ways made the day break never make it through your night time
and yet, go ahead girl and let your light shine
unless, maybe there ain’t none
it’s why i write rhymes
i’m the same son with great love
it’s just aimed up
so none could truly blame the past they came from
sure, when you’ve never been moved, how do you move on?
but you’ve chased smoke signals for far too long and i believe that notion
now your heart grew strong
heels dug in so you can’t feel nothin’
pretend you can delete the moments
but it seeps through, don’t it?
it’s what keeps me hoping
and he will wonder too when he’s old enough, “where’s the oldest one?”
but he ain’t the one that has to start growing up
so throw it up to the sky and put it under the lens ’cause this ain’t where my wondering ends
and ain’t no color paint can cover the bends
ever since the womb ‘till the day your slumber ends
i’ve pondered if i pass what my tomb will say, ‘another slept?'”
who’d eye the sorrow of when my mother wept?
could that move you to pray?
the blues still play in a beautiful way
in these crucial days deep pain maim a weak brain
mean i strain to stay focused and not let the fear grow
became a man in ‘06 at eleven years old
since then climbed from the lowest and the coldest to the highest and the finest
but time has proven to only depart from us and divide us
so i decided i should drag my baggage but i need a larger truck
now, if you start me up
if you start me up
if you start me up i’ll never stop
striving for some better thoughts so i forever remember mom
see, i’m a rolling stone
mama, i’m a rolling stone
and i’m going home
you can tell bella that i’m going home
’cause i’m a rolling stone
mom, i’m just a rolling stone
and i’m going home
please let rowan know that i’m going home
and so it goes
and so it goes
and so it goes
listen
as a matriarch, my mother more than played the part
regardless of circumstance she rose above the call of the worker ants
she may not believe it but this how i prove loyalty
although the bruises foil me
she treated me like true royalty
these things i write
i write them because i miss you
and not a day goes by where i don’t pray i’m with you
and still sometimes i find my mind is in conflict
i contradict logic with passion and get lost in the imagined fashion of a line of chronic fractions
bare boned baritone is all that ensures my slumber
until i’m stirred and disturbed by the thunder
burdened to wonder “where’s home?” and rupture comfort
i never stuck to the structure but punctured the bumper
this rug+burned love learned not to run with the numbers
i’m the son of a blunder but she decided to keep me
it’s no surprise that they try to teach teens cause and effect
so it’s not odd to expect betrayal will sp+wn a loss of respect
if we take the offer we get
sign the terms
but refuse to honor the debt
then the agreed upon penalties have to take place
now, jehovah’s great grace lets us save face and change pace
so please drop the weapons and explain in plain honest expressions
’cause here i am
thinkin’ of you on the bus
sullen smirk
“new slang”
stomach hurts
ran up the summit to plummet first
again, what’s this worth?
falling internally
processing the whispers
shared as earnest deeds
your blessings all withered
you heard whispers too
do you know my blisters grew?
if you saw every scr+p
every whimper my sister knew
i wanna see the score’s sum and a smile with t++th
the files are brief
may take a while to compile the grief
if candor truly stands for something
i thought you’d be back
what’s keeping you?
for every cheap laugh
there’s a glimmer of hope dying inside each month
i’m not bitter or broke but tired of lying to feed love
this scene seems dumb but you can’t be replaced
and when james mercer sings your outline is retraced
i want to make you proud
but our standards differ
and don’t that make all the answers shiver
it’s not that simple and it’s not that complex
you aren’t crippled but nonetheless the conquest
your hunger pangs made you the hunter’s aim
and so passes another day
and a day becomes a decade
perhaps things will never get set straight
yet let’s go through the cycle one last time
i’mma keep on polishing ‘till all the busted hubcaps shine
or the smug grins come back crying
jah, just give me the ability to stand behind my ideals
and a mind that yields
before i hit the pavement hard
lock my statements in the bas+m+nt in a mason jar as i take it far
farther than necessary?
maybe, but check this:
i wear my scars like a fresh necklace
a symbol of remembrance, pride and good fashion
thus my temperance resides with understood passion
caught a glimpse of a stiff lip adrift as you crowd surfed off a cliff
cross ‘get lost’ off the list
the checklist is getting shorter and shorter these days
how about the orders he made?
you locked them in that important briefcase with the rebates and keepsakes
well, wherever you go, be safe
but watch out!
knives don’t have your back
nonetheless be gone
our lives will travel paths all day
someone get me out to this dimly lit hallway
‘cause love changes
best friends become strangers
the west end’s in danger
the rest set their wagers and you say, “let’s get the paper blowing in the wind burning”
me?
i’d rather give the world away
i’d rather give the world away
you hear me?
i’d rather give the world away
i’d rather give the world away
i’d rather…
jonathan richman bemoaned the magical eyes
i have a rational mind and know all about the capital crimes
but my mum once was my national pride
despite being a fallible guy and all my tangible ties
i had to cancel the line
but listen:
i’d rather give the world away
i stand in the valley with these gold statues
built in honor of warriors with these bold tattoos
all i got is a pair of jeans and these old black shoes
and a shirt so thin it lets all of the cold pass through
i advance down the line ’till i see the temple gates
an entire lifetime trying to free my mental state
in this mysterious land is its grand climax
from the cradle to the grave
my hands i grasp
i’ve waited so long
now i’m so close i can’t talk
i’ve always wondered how many roads a must a man walk
and since the womb i’ve wanted to cure my mothers tears
it seems like the journeys done after a hundred years
i walk up the steps
the stairway to the mountain top
as the altitude climbs, the air breaks, the counting stops
the water of the fountain drops
the scene is serene
as i enter into the most holy place of my dreams
reality grabs me and pulls me straight to the ground
unable to move from the shock
i wait for the sound
my b+tterfly net full of dreams then gets snapped in half
i start to rise to my feet while the monsters laugh and laugh
holy spirit fuels me
scriptures inspire me
enabling me to see clearly and paint the pictures entirely
i know what makes a man
being able to break the band
take off the chains of fear of death and take god’s hand
and walk with him
straight down the longest road
and the further he walks, well, the larger god’s promise grows
these are what dreams are made of in a pressure filled mind
inscribing the message on the street when pleasures steals lives
build up the fences to divide the sides and tile the floor
and in the end all i really want to do is smile some more
there’s faith and love in each individual soul
they shape and change even our princ+p+l goals
if we can keep our spirits inspired with zeal
the fires we feel will blaze higher and heal
head
pressure
senses
clutch
message
pavement
fences
jump
touched
desire
god
change
rush
zeal
life
veins
head
pressure
senses
clutch
message
pavement
fences
jump
touched
desire
god
change
rush
zeal
life
veins
from a head full of pressure rests the senses that i clutch
the message on the pavement forms the fences that i jump
i got touched by a desire for god to ignite a change
caught a rush of zeal from the life in my veins
from a head full of pressure rests the senses that i clutch
the message on the pavement forms the fences that i jump
i got touched by a desire for god to ignite a change
caught a rush of zeal from the life in my veins
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