cosi – make believe lyrics
[instrumental intro]
[speech by mark henick]
i climbed back down the other side again. i had very few choices in my life, but this, this was certainly one. and i needed something, anything, that i could be certain about. so i turned around, and i felt the trialing pressing against my back, just below my shoulder blades. i stretched my arms out on its cool, metal surface. i remember feeling rain drops under my fingers. i look down at my shoes, my running shoes were old, worn out, tired. my heels were on the concrete, my toes were on nothing. i look past my toes, to the ground, fifty or so feet below and on the ground i saw a rusted-out chain-linked fence, topped by three strings of barbed wire. as i was standing there, in that moment the only thing that i could think in my collapsed perception, the only thing i was thinking was “how far out would i have to jump from this bridge so that i wouldn’t land on that fence”. because i just didn’t want, i just didn’t want it to hurt anymore. in that moment my entire life was completely in my control. and when you’re living in a hurricane like this all the time, that’s a really unfamiliar, but really satisfying, feeling. to feel like you have control over your whole life
[instrumental outro]
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