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cutthroat mode – if i die lyrics

[juice boi]
i jot my truest thoughts help me free myself
i take the strongest shots help me be myself
i’m k!lling myself slowly i don’t need no help
do a hunnid by my lonely i don’t need no belt
and if i crash let me burn only way i learn
i’m stubborn and i know for sure this is my curse
living life with no concerns getting on their nerves
they’re nervous while i’m standing firm waiting for my turn
to get up in the game and do my thang like i’m ‘pose to
long hard journey just to comeback to the old juice
feelin’ like my old self was tellin’ me “i told you”
stay original like them old schools the old rules still apply
n+ggas don’t abide sleep ’em, lullaby
rather them than my mama cry god i gotta ride
in the nighttime is where i come alive
and if i die pray god greet me like
“boi come inside have a seat
take a load off i think it’s time we speak
i took you from the earth cause you were far from weak
and i’m sorry that i took you from your family
i know right now they’re mad at me
but listen understand you’ll see”
that it’s a warzone, it’s a warzone
better know the devil wants your soul you better hold on
i’ve been fightin’ off these demons everyday for so long
i don’t know if i could go on
[rich rollin’]
figure out your purpose without one you’re as good as worthless
i’m at they service i ain’t perfect but i shook the surface
i was nervous but i couldn’t let it take control they played him
shorty played his role and let it take his toll
made him cold this sh+t told me not to give a f+ck
more than broke i promised mama we gone live it up
my chippers up if i ain’t grindin then i’m in the cut
they hate to see us up but f+ck em we keep flippin bucks
hittin blunts to ease the pain and keep the mind stable
add it up then multiply it know you times tables
blind angles get presented move at your discretion
they get more money but it’s cool ‘cus we get more in blessings
more aggressive, less passive stand on all 10
display your passion through actions then go all in
and greet them haters at the finish with a long grin
been through so much with my brothers hope we all win
it’s been a long spin soaked a lot along the way
way more than grateful all the time i’m to appalled to say
they talking strange that’s my cue to take the safety off
can’t play them short gotta make it home no i can’t take this loss
we takin’ off and we all know that got them sick
problem is the plot got thick and y’all was not legit

[mr. musik]
i couldn’t bring myself to the realization
i’m not where i’m supposed to be
devil was at my throat trynna steer me away
from what god chose for me
trynna hold my smile but you can tell that it’s done forcefully
how do i focus on loving myself when
i’m hurting the people that’s close to me
a lot of sh+ts setting me off
i’m thinking to myself like why do i bother
drinking my liquor like water
got to the point where i need something stronger
i done lost all of my friends and
i hurt my kids when i left their mama
even when times got harder stood my ground
and held my guard up
keepin my head up ain’t too proud to say i cried about it
avoiding all my problems knowing ain’t know way around
face the beast that i created that part i acknowledge
but somedays that beast gets the best of me
and holds me hostage
mental health i’ve endured some pain that you ain’t never felt
physically beat down with sticks, fists and leather belts
tough love, now i’m f+cked up still i forgive ’em
enough beatings in your life you’ll start to catch the rhythm
oh god i’m still on this road that you chose
when it’s cold keep me warm
when it’s hard keep me strong
show me love ’cause i don’t know how to love
father god i’m still on this road that you chose
when it’s cold keep me warm
when it’s hard keep me strong
show me love ’cause i don’t know how to love no

- cutthroat mode lyrics

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