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dj shorts – welcome, mims lyrics

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alright mims, we ain’t never talk much before
but there’s a few things this group should really talk about more
so let me give you an introduction
a tale of mass disruption, and top+level corruption

yeah we’re straight to the to commissioner, an attention+wh0re
a clown+act that you’d never buy tickets for

and he takes the name of nixon
ain’t a game i played in that he ain’t too proud of fixin, and
ain’t a conversation that he ain’t afraid to pitch in
ball’s his last name, but it’s the last name i would give’him

but that’s him
let’s talk about a man who’s actually seen the inside of a gym
rick kochеr, born weed smoker, toker, practical joker
known ghostеr ++ women say “why do i let, him try s+x
when his brain is 10 times smaller than his biceps”

well let’s stay on track
and talk smack about a man who’s used to it, like mike
his brain’s not quite right but it’s a little tragic
man’s about to hit his 30’s and’s still into magic

and there’s one just like him
who walks, talks, and looks just like his twin
except give+or+take 40 pounds more thin
and 40 times more likely to be dating a ten
..year old, if i may be so bold
i’m just repeating things that i’ve been told, like for instance
wrongly handled nutella gives dave panic attacks
and under his khakis he wears a backup pair of slacks

you choose who to believe
me, or some dudes who went to unc
home of the kids with a knack for truancy
and kids with an outright lack of ingenuity

it ain’t new to me, this complete lack of competence
paired with pompousness and doug black’s overconfidence
i guess i see how unc fits in
but how+can+it+take one dude 5 years to just get in

ryan, you knew you had to tie in
the eligible bachelor any woman could marry
a man of good stature with lies he wish he could bury
that he will never love his friends as much as he loves goodberry’s

at least that ginger has class
unlike the other one who sits on his fat ass
and smokes weed until his eyes are red as his head
if you could overdose aj would be a decade past+dead

let’s talk about our local baptistic
todd’s a man of god, mind’s a little simplistic
but the | proof of that is that the packers make him ballistic
and his charts are trash, his statistics can suck ‘dis d+ck
speakin’ of c+cks, let’s talk little d
proud of d1 status but i call him d3
because 3 drinks, and think that we’d all agree
he’ll be out like he is from the league, absentee

‘stache like peach fuzz, dunno what to call it
his kanye posters lookin like jackson pollock
he’s called little d because .. it’s so small, it
can’t even be seen right above his b+ll+cks

that’s all that i wanna say about that
it’s time for the story of pullin’ up by your bootstraps
forrest, from a porche owning
kid, to a tiny a cabin in bum f+ck wyoming

let’s stay focused ‘cause we ain’t even touch on neill
a man who ++ years went by ++ we didn’t know he was real
and then his handlebar snapped us back into reality
we got our own bullock like mr. congeniality

we used to think that he was just an adler personality
but in actuality, he was way too cool for that to be
david’s just a simple man who’s terrified
we’ll realize you don’t have to be cool to be twitter verified

i guess that just leaves me
the last owner added with any loyalty
‘cause mike hoyle’s team is like royalty, an’
you’re just the next replacement to make teams even
and who are you to take the seat?
you who abused dudes in the military?
you who smacked a dude up with a sock of batteries?
… alright man, come in, don’t you worry bout me

so raise your hand and repeat after me
“i, mims, swear to follow rules 1 through three
to keep up to date and partic+p+te in our groupme”
if so, then welcome mims, to the west park league

- dj shorts lyrics

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