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dougie dl - another night with despondency lyrics

intro:
i remember when i first started rapping
i wouldn’t know where to start
i would just put my heart onto the pages
and see how it would all work out

verse 1:
i don’t know where to go
i don’t know which way to flow
opposite like the nile
i’m writing this while lying on the tile
i opened my file
and looked at for a while
i went the extra mile
but was in last place when i crossed the finish line
depressed and obsessed
i want this case
to be recessed
maybe deal with it after it is -ssessed
i’ve regressed
to this state far to many times
i express it through my rhymes
but i still feel like a man who wants to be rich
by trying to collect dimes
i’m going nowhere
i guess i’m stuck here
stuck in this purgatory
hoping that i am one day worthy
maybe i should arrive at a laboratory
and receive some kind of surgery
and if it doesn’t work be shot by some mercenary
i’m living in my own observatory
i’m the most critical audience
everything i do i over -n-lyze
sometimes i hypothesize
like i am isaac newton
i guess i just want to be the man behind a solution
maybe be the man who stops world pollution

chorus:
sometimes it’s hard when you want to do so much
but are just unable to do it
like i wanna change the world
but i just don’t know how to

verse 2:
they gon’ love me for my ambition
who the people watching me in my remission
who the people who control my vision
sometimes i want to get in a collision
but that would interrupt my mission
and i guess i would have to make an admission
an admission about my whole life
how my motives are hidden away in safe
and must be kept safe
cause if the trust gets out
then i guess i’ll be richard nixon
judged by the public
for being an outlier
what i aspire
is something that my parents wouldn’t admire
i’m sick of fluctuating like a tire
i wanna to put out a flyer
saying listen to dougie dl
but the second someone sees it i’ll get a call on my cell
and will mentally be on the dl
i am not doing well
this day could be marked as the one where i fell

chorus:
i’m speechless
i don’t know what to say
what can i say to get noticed
should i just lose myself
and try to be someone i’m not
should i change my train of thought
should i act like i sleep on a cot
in the middle of the streets
and rap like i grew up in poverty and sh-t
yeah maybe then i’d be a hit
but maybe i can resolve all this by taking a hit
(smoking)
f-ck

- dougie dl lyrics

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