fatboys.com - santas lap lyrics
[skinnyd+ckp+n+s]
santa said “sit on my lap”
i was surprised when you did that
it didn’t stop there
every day
you’re sittin’ on laps of other guys
that aren’t me
i would have to lie
if i wouldn’t say
it felt like sh+t
i hate you
i remember when you came to my house
you were wearing nothing but that blouse
that you wore to the mall
when you sat on santa’s lap
i’m so disappointed in you
i can only cry
i look to the sun and
tears come to my eyes
’cause you sat
on santa’s lap
santa wasn’t the only one
you’re the reason for the family i shun
my brother
my sister
my mother
my father
and so on
[cryin’ bryan]
yo, i—i feel you, bro
santa impregnated my girlfriend three years ago
we were so strong, too, that’s the weird part
she’s just a sk+nk
it’s weird that, like…
she just wants alimony
and i have no money
like, i have to go christmas shopping
like, i can’t spend money on a child i’ve never met
like, she just gotta suck it up, honestly, like…
she’s jewish, too, so, like, she’s tryna do the whole hanukkah thing
like, yeah, i got money to spend on christmas, b+tch
the real holidays
so, merry christmas, everyone
not hanukkah, though
d—don’t come at me with that hanukkah
just don’t
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