finn m-k – i actually got a sponsor lyrics
“good evening, ladies and gentlemen”
“this video was sponsored by distrokid”
“sign up today and get—”
i have never had a sponsor
on account of my unmarketable face, but now
i have got my first sponsor
my stonks up in this internet place
are you a musician like me, independent of digital music distributor and also girlfriend?
i can solve one of those problems!
if you wanna get your music into stores and streaming services
such as spotify, amazon, apple music, itunes, tik tok, tidal, deezer, instagram and more
then i’ve got a tip for you
sign up with distrokid today, you goon
legit, i recommend this service
and not only because they paid me to
i’ve been using distrokid for three dang years, bud!
they send me a hundred percent of my earnings (unlike those other places)
which gives me the time to do my snow pruning
cable management
and vincent van gogh cosplay
plus when you sign up with this spicy hot vip link
you get seven percent off a year’s membership!
that’s a deal so exciting
i need to walk all the way up keychange mountain to properly express my feelings about it
that’s hot, what a good deal, finn!
“when i get out of prison i’ll sign up, thanks to you”
cool stuff, your music will be streamin’
these deals are criminal but not as criminal as you
“why are you in prison, anyway?”
“’cause i didn’t sign up with distrokid!”
“they wouldn’t throw you in prison for that”
“also i ate a bunch of people”
“oh”
“it’s what i do!”
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