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gash & ail – the house of lords lyrics

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[verse 1: gail and ash]
do you remember when you were very small?
your name above the coat peg in the cloakroom at school
and the prefects makin’ sure you went through the right door
well, it’s like that in the bowels of the house of lords

[spoken: gail]
except the prefects are younger and more like carers

[verse 2: gail and ash]
and the plastic#coated funny tray
you queued up with impatiently every day
for some subsidised slop to keep the hunger away
it’s like that in the bowels of the house of lords

[spoken: gail]
except they get subsidised monkfish for three quid a bl##dy pop

[chorus: gail and ash]
have you been in the house of lords and wandered through its corridors?
its institutionalisation is just like our education###
system, too many similarities to list ’em
b#ll#cks to the lot of it
where’s the need for this uniform sh#t?

[verse 3: gail and ash]
‘course there are differences, i couldn’t help but see
like the average age of a school kid isn’t 93
and it’s definitely stronger, the good old smell of wee
when you walk among the ghosts in the house of lords

[spoken: gail]
i say walk, more like swerving through a slowed#down zombie apocalypse

[verse 4: gail and ash]
and i have to mention, as it’s what i observed
that almost all of those i saw employed there to serve
had stunning dark skin, and i wonder what they’re tryna preserve
as i wander in the depths of the house of lords

[spoken: gail]
i say depths, it’s the shallowest place i’ve ever been to

[chorus: gail and ash]
have you been in the house of lords and wandered through its corridors?
its institutionalisation is just like our education###
system, too many similarities to list ’em
b#ll#cks to the lot of it
where’s the need for this uniform sh#t?

[outro: gail, gail and ash]
well i met judy dench (she was tiny)
mouthed “c#nt” at nigel lawson (he’s still slimy)
saw corbyn in the canteen (he seemed okay)
he’d been called scruffy (by cameron that day)
so he was probably pleased to see (my dishevelled self)
among all that ugly (displaced wealth)
and despite the hurt of being there (i did still enjoy)

two hands#free w#nks with my new s#x toy

- gash ail lyrics

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