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hotel books – all my friends are trees (part iii) lyrics


i, i feel like a mouth facilitating the language
constructed by the mind of depression
a vocal confirmation that i have diluted my ambition
to accommodate my aggression

watered-down prayer requests to a sky painted blue
like the ocean of my heart
settled for what i detest to a lie that the truth kept us apart
with a sea between hope and me
i lack the ability to figure out where to start
letting fear sit in the driver’s seat to a he-rs-
to comfort me as i drive back to insanity with heart

disconnected from the discontent strategies
de-straddled the child inside of me
feeding greens to the the malnourished spirit i identified myself as
a heart of gl-ss, fragile enough to break
but once put on display, it doesn’t hurt so bad

’cause some moments, i felt sick, i felt poisoned
but other moments, i was asleep
it was a day i felt chosen, but through self-torment
i was knee deep in a sinking sand called grief
feeling let down by my poor decisions
i felt an eternity without you, was one not worth living?
i hope to someday have enough faith to believe in god
as much as he believes in me
i hope to someday have the faith to believe in god
as much as he believes in me

after years of feeling inadequate to the bars set
by those superior to me, i found strength
but not in the place i was looking
investing monetary value into the half-truth of pharmaceuticals being quiet, a ghost
i finally became accepting of myself as part of the solution
no more of that pointless appointment booking

i surrendered control to the heart inside of me
and let my p-ssion drive until i was done completely
done completely out of the hole, and gained back control
saved from the cold, feeling back home
or maybe feeling home for the first time

because for the first time in a long time, i felt alive
i felt the ability to strive
i felt like there were odds stacked for me
and love was on my side

everybody has the strength to do great things
as long as we don’t compromise for a world of things
darling, you deserve so much more
than what this world has given you; i promise it’s true
and if you see through it, you can do anything
anything you set your heart to

i’ve been at the lowest point
beyond anything i ever did foresee
and with the power of love and ambition
i found myself back into a place of peace
and you are deserving of authenticity and legitimacy
and the riveting awakening that can only be found
through the love and defeat of a beautiful king
no tyranny, but family holding you together as the wounds heal

you are deserving of so much more
than what this world is offering
you are deserving of so much more
than what this world is offering
you’re deserving of the love of a beautiful king