infidelity – april 2019 lyrics
april 2019
the month i figured i’d stop eating
i was trying to look better to please others
mind’s deceiving i’m thinking
“i’m fat gross disgusting”
discussing with myself on what to cut from my day
got only crumbs on my plate
tears falling down my face
waterworks everyday
wonder what mom would say
stress built up to the top
there’s never any release when you feel alone
no one could help even when they tried
so i’m thinking this is it
this is my life now and i can’t fix sh+t
no way
so i’m thinking this is it
this is my life now and i can’t fix sh+t
september 2019
the month i told my mom
heartbroken she had already known felt less alone
gotta take this road and i’m feeling more hope
maybe in time i won’t be skin and bone who knows
it all has to start with me
i need to put the effort in
as hard as it seems
gotta wait and see
so i’m thinking this is it
i’m on a road to redemption
man i gotta solve this
okay
so i’m thinking this is it
i’m on a road to redemption
man i gotta solve this
january 2020
the month i’m writing this song
i’m feeling better not fully but i’m getting stronger everyday
i got a lot on my plate mentally and physically
but i’m in a better state
slow pace to recovery
but i’m on my way
it’s a brighter day
it’s a brighter day
he’s seeing brighter days
now that he’s happier
strolling through the city
head high like a bachelor
funny how i’m still in love
zero thoughts of moving on
proved himself he never wrong
put him down to make a song
you’d never know how long it took me just to build my confidence
confidential hid away
was afraid to show my face
thinking life would never change
found a friend who felt the same
now we always on the same page
longing for them same days
summer 16
everything was in it’s place
everything was in it’s place
i lost those people then
i guess we’re better now
i’m seeing better days
i’m seeing better days
i’m seeing better days
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