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introvert (pa) – the college experience (single) lyrics

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did you touch yourself while he f-cked you?
yes.​
you rang for him?
sometimes.​
and he does?
we do everything that people who have sex do.​
did you accept the role?
yes.​
then why did you do that?
i don’t know. ​

yes.​

and to think you weren’t sweeter. ​

f-ck off and die. you f-cking slut.​

i keep on losing just to keep you from leaving
but if i keep this up, pretty soon i’ll have nothing
what’s the point in lying?
i’m wrapped around your fingers
when they slide down my throat
it’s anxiety that lingers

maybe just five more pounds and i can finally be happy. ​
just another inch off the waist, maybe then she’ll love me. ​

blackout, just to forget who you f-cked
it’s always easier than falling in love
drink behind the wheel, drive yourself home
it’s easiest to explain when you’re all alone

/
[left]
we were brothers, don’t you f-cking lie to me. ​
f-ck you, and f-ck you too. f-ck the both of you. ​

[right]
where the f-ck is he?
what the f-ck is the college experience?
what the f-ck does that even mean?
you’re leaving me over this?
/

just five more pounds,​
and i’ll finally be happy. ​
another inch off the waist,​
why the f-ck won’t you love me?

is it my love-hate relationship
with every f-cking mirror?
or that i binge and i purge
always striving to be thinner?
what’s the f-cking difference?
in case you haven’t noticed
i’m splitting at the seams
and you’re the reason i wrote this

’cause f-ck happiness right?
it’s nothing but a way to help you sleep through the night
yeah, f-ck happiness, right?
i hope you never feel it again in your life
f-ck happiness, right?
it’s just a way to waste time ‘til you walk towards the light
yeah, f-ck happiness, right?

i guess i should have known
just a mistake from the start
i tried everything i could
to keep from falling apart
tore myself down to pieces
reduced myself to nothing
i still couldn’t keep you from reaching for something
for someone else
it’s always someone else
and when it all falls apart, you can find me in h-ll
still sick, still cursed, stuck in the back of this he-rs-
but if it’s this or with you
at least i know which is worse.​

i know that you have woven yourself into my bones.​
but i can no longer be your home.​
i know that you have woven yourself into my bones.​
but i can no longer
be
your
home. ​