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jaytekz – hello, misery lyrics

[intro]
nuh, nuh
yo what
oh f-ck
okay
we’re recording? okay, okay, okay
um whats up guys
my name is jaytekz
uhh, i make music
i’m f-cking emotional, and
just listen to some of my story, f-ck it

[verse]
i been thinking lately
what if i ain’t really meant for this
i know this path i’m on is filled with greed and treacherous
a pessimist i’m not, but i just been through so much sh-t
it’s hard to heal when i been damaged since i was a kid
but you don’t understand, my trials or my tribulations
to be fair you never been within my situations
i ain’t saying i got it worse but it f-cked me up
so many scars i’ve been calling god to touch me up, yeah
and honestly i haven’t prayed lately
haven’t slept at all and i just haven’t ate lately
i been drinking too, just to find a better mood
a couple brews always keeps my heart from feeling bruised
haha, get it, or was that too corny?
i digress, let me get right back into my story
a year and six months i was in sobriety
i tried to be the very best version i could be
but i guess my feelings finally caught up to me
cause now i’m sitting here just buzzing like a bumblebee
i know they’re judging me and probably think i’m weak minded
but you ain’t here while i’m hurting on the brink of dying
yeah, i know there’s probably no excuse
but my present and my past still haven’t made a truce
i had a poisoned youth stemmed from my poisoned roots
so when i blossomed i just had to face my poisoned truth
that i lost my innocence way too early on
now that i’m grown up i realize the burden’s strong
i’ve been searching long and hard for a sense of purpose
i’ve been searching deep within way beyond the surface
but what i find is always quite disturbing
i see my life and death in the process of converging
they’re conversing with each other getting well acquainted
it’s no wonder why i feel my soul is often tainted
or maybe i’m just being dramatic
or maybe things i’ve been through have truly been traumatic
i panic when i think about the things i have no answers to
so many questions and n0body seems to have a clue
and i don’t know who i can trust no more
i try to open up and everybody shuts the door
the more i try to love, the more i end up feeling worthless
i wish reciprocity was something we could purchase
but people often take advantage
that’s why i feel so numb and my comp-ssion slowly vanished
i haven’t been myself since um, i don’t know when
now my heart is cold and it’s slowly getting frozen
i soak in all my tears when i sit alone at home
i let out all my fears and thoughts with these open poems
a broken home that’s exactly what my heart is
a broken soul that’s been camping in the darkness, yeah
and if i never see the light again
i hope you all can still see the burning light within
the fight within has been coming to a subtle and
and when it’s over i just hope that all my troubles end, yeah
i have no clue what the future holds
but if tomorrow never comes know that you’ve been told
all about my pain, sorrows and my misery
i told my story i just wish that you were listening

- jaytekz lyrics

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