joe scudda – door to my life lyrics
[verse one]
i used to drown away in liquor, any kind
no occ-ssions, i got bent any time
sleep all day, be up all night
i convinced myself that everything was alright
when it really won’t
you know it’s wrong but you really don’t
started feeling like, i ain’t sh-t
it started after my job that i ain’t quit
said i’d get another one so i ain’t trip
now it turn into six months
everyday burning six blunts
and i ain’t even wrote six rhymes
i used to front all the time like “sh-t’s fine”
i wouldn’t show my feelings i said them sh-t’s mine
and i won’t put ’em on another man
said i can do it by myself and i don’t need another hand
play the cards i’m dealt, always kept an ace
seldom smile, kid kept a poker face
used to being alone
back and forth so much, the jump out started being my home
two quarters on the corner started being my phone
hope somebody picks me up before i’m already gone
[hook]
open the door to my life
do you like what you see?
is it what you thought it would be?
this is all i’ve got to give
open the door to my life
do you like what you see?
is it what you thought it would be?
let me be, just let me live my life
[verse two]
now i’m feeling like a dummy
hungry
yo, i’m sick of eating food bought by other people money
sick of getting things just to have ’em get took from me
open the door to my life, sh-t ain’t all funny
sh-t ain’t all good
think if we can change our past
truthfully i bet we all would, but we can’t
so i don’t think if we could
the stubbornness in my life won’t let me think if i should
that’s why i smoke mad c.i.’s
told moms i would quit
couldn’t do it in three tries
i’m going through things, just like you
my pops need a new heart, i’m just like john q
so imagine how i feel
dad disabled, moms a teacher
and i’m too broke to pay a f-cking bill
man i’m feeling worthless
plus these dreams of rapping conflict me in this nine to five work sh-t
why’s life like this for?
why did god put this stress in my life and made me write this for?
pain cuts a little deeper than a knife
open your eyes youngin
look deeper into my life
[hook]
[verse three]
now when i left home, no hugs and goodbyes
no tears in they eyes, and what a surprise
n0body said “joe, let me help you move in.”
cause honestly, i ain’t know where i was moving
hope i wouldn’t see dudes that i went to school with
i cut off all girls i used to fool with
thinking, don’t let cats know that i was doing bad
still stuck off the memories of things i used to have
like the clothes, the hoes, the cash
looking at old pictures, thinking like, “d-mn i had a blast”
i loved them times, wish they would never p-ss
but i’m stuck in one spot, headed nowhere fast
tough times but you know what life’s about
peace to kayon and blue for letting me crash on the couch
mcni for holding down the house
open the door to my life…it’s coming out
[hook]
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