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john wells - no drugs in heaven lyrics

woah woah
no drugs in heaven

[verse}
see i was born july 31, 1968
my mama said a tree had fell
on the crib the same day
actually it was my father
that’s what he said when he called her
he wasn’t inside the room when i was born
my big brother was just about to be two
in like thirty days or less
we had to move to an apartment
that tree had made a mess
my daddy worked at bethlehem steel
my momma who he paid for gas and
we ain’t have much at all
but they maintained it we blessed
they was both from jefferson street
’bout a block away from thе hospital
that al capone had died in when
my daddy was ’bout to bе two
his momma was an immigrant
that died when he was just a child
his daddy died when he was fifteen
and that was ’round the time he’s moving
to the county in the neighborhood
called hawth+rne
made a brick like in the city
but you gonna need a lawnmower
’cause we in the sticks and that’s how
it was lookin’ long before
i was born
for those from out of town
i live in baltimore so
everybody either sniffin’ heroine
or smokin’ marijuana
it’s two sides to every coin here
but you gotta touch either side
just to get to the other side of the other
so by the time i was walking in kenwood
me and my brother was disappointing
my mother and showing up at the door
in handcuffs and hoping
that she still love us
in my defense, it had took me awhile
to f+ck with the other sh+t
at eighteen i start seein’ rocks but
i never f+ck with it
my brother did
sold ’em some blow to an undercover
what our daddy beat us with where our troubles is
felt like we was nothing
we really not doin’ nothing
so it’s nothing you can tell us
while we tryna figure out how to live
[verse]
i dropped out in the tenth grade
and moved to ocean city with my momma
got a job to [?] again while
i was sellin’ marijuana
now to cam i’m seventeen
i never told y’all i could sing
but i be soundin’ like a jackson
but i’m just as white as
dr. king’s statue in d.c
but that’s where i be singin’ at
and that’s where a man sellin’ dreams
was just happenin’ to be
but even then it seems that
i didn’t believe
how i expect to see progress
in some sh+t i never seen?

[verse]
payin’ my papa checks
cause we, got a lot of stress
on top our heads
i just collect my weed
and smoke a lot of it
and pocket every dollar
i be profitin’
and after awhile i move
back around the way
and “say no” is the phrase
that they coin
but not a lot has changed
as time passed
the chemical imbalances
inside my brain became
a lot to carry
so i medicate to hide the pain
i’m distancin’ so far
i don’t understand what my momma sayin’
to keep my spirit high i kept
my cousin’s ’round to try cocaine
[verse]
in ’95 i met a girl named debby
we got married in ’96
had a son in ’97
swore he’d never be like this
debby was from california
and her daddy was a vet
he got hit and got the purple heart
i’m at war with myself
i had a job cuttin’ grass with bg
and me and my lady had a job at the bank
and she had a degree
i’m good long as my family safe
and i knew i could eat the pain
the day i fell off a tractor and it cut off my feet
it turns out i’m a brilliant actor
awake through surgery
and while we had our back turned
they stole my lady purse that day
and they gave me my perc’s that day
in may of ’03
and now i’m laid up in a wheelchair
with no places to be

[verse]
but then someday i started walking again
that’s when i told my son that pain is a sensation
that mentally we can overcome
and then he broke his leg in two years
and the rhetoric was he’d never walk again
but he did
so now they call him luck
his grades slipped, but he persevered
he was smarter than me
they told my mama i was r+t+rded
so that’s what i believed
i passed my ged with a d
but luckee a’s and b’s
and qualities they seein’ in him
they didn’t see in me
i’m happy with it
buddy’d do anything
if his daddy did it
i just told him, “don’t be like me”
cause he can be better than this
started slippin’ after that happened
and then my daddy got cancer
that was august ’06
he died in march of ’07
i slipped and fell and spent
a night sittin’ in jail
i told luckee i had a problem
i had to get taken care of
went to rehab somewhere out east
and sure i figured it wasn’t for me
i caught a hat back to ess+x
and showed up at my mama door
like, “imma fix it myself”
but i got laid off every year
when it got colder
and that sh+t didn’t help
and my relationship with shorty
gettin’ f+cked up as can be
i start to notice that these drugs
is destroying my family how they does
and luck was turnin’ sixteen
his mans caught a charge for murder
but he stayed out the streets
cause luck be spittin’ bars
he said that’s how this country built to be
and he knew what it was
i said he don’t know sh+t and dismissed it
because i didn’t understand
until years later
i drove my truck down to my mama crib
at the bottom of florida
cause i put my hands on his mama
she forced me to leave
after she called the police
but now my son is eighteen
and i don’t know what to believe
cause how the f+ck is these drugs gettin’ to me
i had to come to my senses
and take responsibility
cause i just stole a bunch of bread
to get down to my mama crib
while my baby boy is a man
and they know everywhere he be
i had to tell ’em lay low until
i get back on my feet
came back in two weeks
put it back where it’s supposed to be
but now this job is not enough
so i’m falling back on the weed
that i’m growing out of the crib
and the pills that’s prescribed to me
but y’all know the saying
“never get high on your own supply”
and now my cousins live with me
and the youngest is forty+five
and we was junkies
got evicted and my son was twenty+one
[verse]
it’s 2018
i’m livin’ in a tent deep in the woods
and i just lost a stepson to
the same drugs that i’m sniffing up
but luck exhibit so much potential
so i just pray for one day that he can
lift me up
but he still gotta pick me up
to go to my appointments
so i could get my insurance
cause this money gotta get me sum
lawyers movin’ slow
in 2020 i got kicked out of shelter
nowhere to go
i had to head back to my mama
and i said goodbye to luck
that was the third to last time
he ever saw me standing up
and then in four months
it was june
called luck to wake him up
and tell him i was in the hospital
and don’t know what to do
but i don’t think he understood
because i wasn’t making sense
i was slurring my words
because my kidney & liver went
that night i died and got resuscitated
i was in the hospital in miami
where they say the gangsters go to die
so right now i got my mother goin’ crazy
and my son is knowin’ everything
my brother told my old lady about

[verse]
but now we talkin’ everyday
me and luck
he even came to see me
he was there to comfort my mother
but luckee [?] meet me
and he got to show me his lady
and she was beautiful
i said, “you doin’ good for yourself boy
if only you knew”
my clock tickin’ relentlessly
and the last time he saw me standing up
the doctor said it was
the end for me
insurance wouldn’t cover me
and life wasn’t enough for me
to live inside a hospital while
i was hooked up to machines
and i ain’t talked to god in awhile
but now my son is saying
that we don’t really die
when we die, we go to another place
i promise this is not the end
when i’m not here physically
i hope i’m an example cause
this what withdraw did to me
i spent my life
runnin’ from feelings i could’ve swerved
my lady look at me crazy
she didn’t want me in hers

[verse]
july 6th
my son picked up his girl
after he cried
and that’s because that was
the day that i died
i can confirm
it really ain’t no drugs in heaven
and i’m better than i was before
don’t feel the need to do ’em
cause n0body up here hurt no more
regardless of the fact i had no money
when i died
i’m the reason lor luckee
the best rapper alive
f+ck is you talkin’ ’bout

- john wells lyrics

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