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juice rap news – rn11: australia day – with ken oathcarn lyrics

[robert foster]
g’day, mates, this is rap news on your radio waves
reporting today on that distant australian state
where on the 26th of january they annually celebrate
a date that they denominate “australia day”
but, much as in the us of a with columbus day
or canada day, in canada, eh, each year a debate takes place
as to the way societies built on colonial occupation
should celebrate the genesis of their cherished nation
so today, we have an australian correspondent from channel mine
can you hear me, ken oathcarn?

[ken oathcarn]
ken oathcarn!
how ya goin’! i’m reportin from straya, hey!
coming live and that, providin’ facts on this amazin’ day
when we take a national holiday off from hard yakka
and celebrate with barbies, beer, charred tucker
mates, eskis, sheilas, the thorpedo
vegemite, miners, tony abbot, short speedos

[robert foster]
but… what exactly are you celebrating?

[ken oathcarn]
i’ll tell ya, robbo… but first, before we begin
i’d like to acknowledge the traditional robbers of this land
d’you like what we’ve done with the place? ain’t it grand?!
yehhh, it all started here in 1788
after captain crook discovered this pristine real estate
we were stray-aliens looking for a place to settle in
so we landed in sydney with the first fleet of 11 ships
it was no-one’s land, unpopulated, terra nullius
so we built fences, bridges, opera-houses, and deforested
made heaps of land for growing lambs and, in time
since that land was ours we started to mine! mine! mine!
and now, regardless of footy-team, creed or ethnic persuasion
we celebrate this day as one nation

[robert foster]
hmm… it seems strange that in order to be a proud australian
you celebrate a british military occupation

[ken oathcarn]
– eh?

[robert foster]
moving on: aboriginal people

[ken oathcarn]
you mean, ‘blackfellas’?

[robert foster]
are they included in this day?

[ken oathcarn]
ken oathcarn!

[robert foster]
then tell us, why they name it “invasion day” and “survival day”?
did it mark the start of war, even genocide – as some say?

[ken oathcarn]
nahhh, we had a peaceful settlement, an intervention:
brought those poor natives blankets, medicines;
raised them from the stone age, gave ’em income management
and even tried to smooth their pillows to content them
that’s the ‘strayian way – so we now enjoy our conquest
and worship this altar of flamin’ gas with clear consciences
we brought the crown and tb to this land, c-nt
and arnott’s tim tams – what more could you want?

[robert foster]
well, how about changing australia day to a less… offensive date?

[ken oathcarn]
such as?

[robert foster]
any other day would be better to celebrate:
how about the date australia was federated?

[ken oathcarn]
january 1st? mate, on that date, we already get wasted

[robert foster]
how about may 27, then, the day when, back in ‘sixty-seven
australians voted in a great referendum
in which ninety per-cent of you said, “fair d-nk-m:
aboriginals are humans too, let’s make them citizens.”

[ken oathcarn]
listen, robbo, ‘straya day is here to stay
chris’sakes, mate, we already had sorry day
and who are you anyway – some pommy poofter, try’nna judge me?
if you don’t like it here, then get the f-ck out of me country!
australia!
australia!
‘straya day!
yeah, c-nt!
comin’ again, to celebrate invasion
‘straya day!
yeah, c-nt!
denial is the only way, c-nt
refugees, you’re f-cking screwed, if you try to come into
australia! yeah, c-nt!
c-nt c-nt c-nt c-nt c-nt c-nt c-nt c-nt c-nt!
this is ken oathcarn; reporting for channel mine, from the lucky cunnnnt-ry

[robert foster]
thank you, ken, you’ve helped us all to see
why this date, and no other has got to be the national holiday
‘australia day’; it reflects an honest memory
of the first day of systematic robbery
and denial of the natives’ sovereignty
on which was built this great settler-colony
to change the day without acknowledging this
well… wouldn’t that simply be m-ssive hypocrisy?
‘lest we forget’ – we often say of our brave heroes
but if we take pride in our ancestors’ achievements
shouldn’t we also recognize their malfeasant ways?
’til then, i bid you all, happy ‘amnesia day’

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