martin sheffield-lickley – the restaurant of love lyrics
i made a reservation at the restaurant of love
where they only have tables for two
instead of taking my order, the waiter gave me a kiss
instead of food, i ate perfume
the love restaurant failed its recent health inspection
because the kitchen is infested with rats
i’m not talking love rats, these are regular rats
and they’re biting all the customers and staff
i got food poisoning at the love restaurant
pretty sure it was caused by the rats
i posted a one#heart review on yelp.com/love
then the business owner contacted me privately
he said, “why’d you give my restaurant a one#heart review?”
i said, “because it was full of rats”
he said, “this is a small business and this review could ruin me”
he cried over the phone and said he was trying his best
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