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matchbox 420 – anti hentai hentai club lyrics

[verse – bars mitzvah]

catch me jerking off to hentai every motherf-cking day
cuz these bouncy drawn t-tties got me going insane
godd-mn, think i’m gonna have to move to j-pan
cuz these tentacle are making s-m-n shoot out of my t-st-cl-s
f-ck all real women
they can’t even compete
i don’t care about v-g-n- unless it’s 2d
all the girls in real p-rn have to be at least 18
while all these s-xy anime b-tches have barley hit p-b-rty
which isn’t a problem, cuz they’re just drawings on a screen
not to mention the j-panese age of consent is 13
little f-ckers be hating, but it’s just another art style
so you better think twice before calling me a pedophile
uh, uh
senpai gonna make me nut
high pitched, innocent voice with the tight b-tt
baby girl i wish you weren’t stuck in my computer
i wanna take you out of there and nibble on your hooters
imma watch this weeb sh-t until the whole world ends
f-ck you, mom and dad, imma never get a girlfriend
or move out of this house
i’m king of the bas-m-nt
cuz w-nking it to school girls getting spanked makes me complacent
theres not much else to it
life is sh-t
but animated p-ssy gets me through it
real p-rn sucks, hentai is the best
especially the kind that features schoolgirls and incest
and really cool plot lines, elements of sci-fi
kinda makes me wish i had my very own concubine
i’d lock her in my closet
feed her pop-tarts and gatorade
tie her to my bedpost while she smacks up my meat, babe
not to be creepy, i just think it would be fun
to have a real live person here and have my p-n-s rubbed
but i got hentai all day
i don’t need to get laid
all i need is my computer when i wanna gush mayonnaise

b-tch

[verse – dom the matrix]

hentai? motherf-cker you can hen-die
i can’t believe i have to write a verse about why
f-cking hentai is the bane of society’s existence
it’s disgraceful, to watch you jerk off
just like a piston
to this animated p-rn thats just perverted and wrong
and it doesn’t make it any better just because it’s drawn
f-ck you
for calling this sh-t an “art style”
i can’t express how much that this makes you a pedophile
it should be against the law, i wanna make it a crime
to m-st-rbate to something called “yamata’s first time”
i know that it’s just a comic
but you’re still looking at kids
i can’t believe that you can’t see how f-cked this really is
the only thing that should be 2d are your grades and your studies
not getting hot and bothered over sl-tty hentai hunnies
you argue that this type of p-rn is healthy and its ethical
but tell me what’s so moral about rape involving tentacles
i get that no ones being forced into s-x work
but you’re still objectifying and you’re still a f-cking jerk
our species are so advanced
and our brains are so enhanced
yet you’re more concerned with looking at school girls without pants
get a job
get a life
get a hobby my guy
and try and move out of your parent’s house before you’re 35

[response – bars mitzvah]

first off, shut up
and second, be quiet
it’s none of your concern what i jerk off to in private
besides, it’s not little kids that make me spray goo
i’m not a pedophile, only drawings of them do

[response – dom the matrix]

did you not listen to that verse?
or what i had to say?
jerking off to drawings doesn’t make it okay
the princ-p-ls the problem, even though that it’s not real
it’s f-cked up cucks like you to which this pervy sh-t appeals

[response – bars mitzvah]

i don’t watch it for the kids, though, i watch it for the plot
the aesthetic, the artwork, animation and whatnot
you can’t just focus in on one part of the package
theres more than perversion, to anime fappage
it’s part of a culture that you just do not get
and maybe it would be best, if you would just let this go
like bro, n0bodys even making you watch it
so stop yucking my yum dude
its f-cking obnoxious

[response – dom the matrix]

then just watch a normal anime for crying out loud
i feel like you are just upset because you’re not well endowed
it’s not that i don’t get it
because honestly i do
just jerk off to something normal, like ‘horton hears a who’

[outro (skit) ]

bars mitzvah: wait wait wait
dom the matrix: what
bars mitzvah: how is jerking off to ‘horton hears a who’ like any less weird than jerking off to hentai?
dom the matrix: what do you mean? that’s exactly what these books are written for
bars mitzvah: i… i don’t think that’s true
dom the matrix: i really think that’s exactly true
bars mitzvah: what, why? why do you think that?
dom the matrix: because, why would they be so f-cking attractive?
bars mitzvah: … sh-t, thats a good point

- matchbox 420 lyrics

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