michael dorman – french gun lyrics
the janky plan begins today
today i start to make my way
to a french gun
the iranians
they get forty ’cause he’s a dignitary
they get all the guns that they can carry
and there’s almost no other way
to get a gun today
in france
but say you are a senegalese grocer
with a tiny little joint in a rough neighborhood
and you keep
getting your -ss beat
and you’re just stackin’ up the crackers
some french f-cker takes your cash register
and leaves you beat
down in a heap
in france
if you are attacked in your place of business
and can demonstrate loss of property and consciousness
on the thirteenth attack
oh man, you get strapped
in france
they keep all the names of all the french gun owners
in this kind of cool french tower
under lock and key
so someone like me
a-doesn’t wander in and snag a random name
find the guy then f-ck him for his gun
which is why i’m climbing up
to the very top
in france
there’s no way it occured to security
that someone would jump from the roof to the balcony
’cause it’s forty feet
and you would have to be
a-pretty f-cking crazy or just educated
on how to cross the ventasner meridian
so you would have a chance to land
and just be unconscious
for seventeen minutes
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