monty python – bruces’ philosophers song lyrics
immanuel kant was a real p-ssant
who was very rarely stable
heidegger, heidegger was a boozy beggar
who could think you under the table
david hume could out-consume
wilhelm freidrich hegel
and wittgenstein was a beery swine
who was just as schloshed as schlegel
there’s nothing nietzsche couldn’t teach ya
’bout the raising of the wrist
socrates, himself, was permanently p-ssed
john stuart mill, of his own free will
on half a pint of shandy was particularly ill
plato, they say, could stick it away
half a crate of whiskey every day
aristotle, aristotle was a b-gg-r for the bottle
and hobbes was fond of his dram
and rene descartes was a drunken fart
“i drink, therefore i am.”
yes, socrates himself is particularly missed
a lovely little thinker, but a b-gg-r when he’s p-ssed
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