raptors – ‘scallions lyrics
(senator bumpington)
shut up, maggie
uh
uh
uh
uh
uh
t-tties
1,2,3
gettin’ head in cl-ss, you can call me a phrenologist
b-tches starvin’ for my d-ck like they were jamestown colonists
i’m a realist, b-tch
but i don’t do much painting
huffed propane for an hour, yeah
without even fainting
spit my verse in church
and they called it black magic
francis heard raptors
and said we couldn’t be catholic
raptors spreading legs
call it the great schism
we’ll chop off your head
and convert your kids to raptorism
aw t-ts i’m takin’ tylenol bong hits
bump and rybz at your door
and we’re here for your kids
uh
i got big raptor claws
uh
i got big raptor jaws
ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
i’ll make you feel bad
by calling out your flaws
i stay dirty
ah
you can call me the grouch
raptors all up in your house, yo
like we was your couch
deadly on the air
so we’re radioactive
get on rich b-tches faces
like we was proactiv
call haters hot potaters
cuz they’re gonna get dropped
raptors eating h-rny b-tches
like we was triceratops
if you’re having raptor problems
you should probably run
we’re gonna hatchet your brain
rap game
gary paulson
raptors make you move
like eminent domain
salty and sweet
like feminine lo mein
work at the taco bell
cuz i rap under pressure
call me don f-ll-tio
cuz i’m always a pleasure
(gorgeous steve)
it’s ya boy greasy d
half-cousin to greasy c
i’m heading to the sleazy-3s
where i’m making b-tches wheeze
as soon as they get a peek at f-d-r
ain’t got nuthin to fear but fear itself
my d-ck’s putting loaves of bread
on your local food shelf
in the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghost
raptors getting hot like your momma’s pot roast
b-tches call me catnip
cuz i’m making p-ssies squirm
ravishing your insides
like a schizophrenic sperm
they want fdr
but i don’t know if they’re ready
when you see my d-ck
you’ll think you saw the yeti
raptors played the vatican in 1994
not even john paul kept his feet on the floor
call me father and reverend gorgeous steve
even castro and gorbachev genuflect to me
f-cking martin luther
and his 95 theses
raptors make you wear the brown robe
like -ssisi
our father, who art in heaven
raptors ain’t kosher
cuz we like our bread leavened
and our women, porked
and drowned in gin
raptors will euthanize you
à la kevorkian
(ted mils)
yo the names ted mils
i read a lot of scientology
i’m coming in your virgos
f-cking up your astrology
i spot the seven sisters and the pleiades
my body is a temple, b-tch
now get on your knees
yo, i slayed goliath
i’m that c-nt that sacked rome
watching animal planet
while you’re giving me dome
i got blood on my grail
got bodies on my lawn
yo, raptors got more b-tches than babylon
but i’m a christian boy
i believe in reaganomics
and you, b-tch got more issues
than a marvel comic
so light the candles, and start the sermon
got a beard like jesus
but i’m a full-blooded vermin
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