rhett and link – color a mythical beast (live) lyrics
(non+music lyrics in ++bold++)
[verse 1: rhett and +link+]
on the first day of 1st grade
we were both held in from recess
’cause we were both writing profanity on our desks
++i wrote h+ll!++
+++i wrote d+mn!+++
+++but i spelled it d+a+m, so it technically wasn’t a curse word…+++
+but i think mrs. locklear knew my intentions…+++
our punishment was coloring unicorns
and that’s when we became best friends
but equally as important
we never defaced public property again!
[chorus]
so if you’ve got a kid who’s
writing obscene graffiti
give him a picture of a mythical beast
and he will cease
to write profanity
don’t write profanity
[verse 2: rhett and +link+]
++now, this might seem like something cute we just wrote in a song++
++but it’s actually true++
++it has been scientifically proven that you cannot formulate curse words while coloring pictures of mythical beasts.++
+++allow me to demonstrate+++
+++ass+itote+++
+++shi+ver me timbers+++
+++fu+nnel cakes+++
+++mo+ther fu+nnel cakes!+++
++you see, it’s mother fu+nnel cake+ing impossible++
[outro]
so if you’ve got a kid
who’s writing obscene graffiti
give him a picture of a mythical beast
and he will cease
to write profanity
don’t write profanity
just color a mythical beast!
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