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rhett and link – freelance fireworks hall of fame (extended version) lyrics

here in south carolina
we do things different
when it comes to fireworks we don’t hire professionals

we are professionals
we got what you call “freelance firework shows”
this song is a tribute to an elite set of men
who exercized their inalienable right
to shoot off fireworks
bobby taught us by example
not to look down a roman candle
when you light it
he lost his right eye
but you know he’s a better looking guy
without it
and that jumbo bottle rocket
that lit in his pocket
would have flew
if it weren’t for his beltloop
we were listening to elvis
when it shattered his pelvis
but it was cool ’cause it blew
right at the end of don’t be cruel
this song is for
all our pyrotechnical heroes
what they lacked in descression
they made a big combustion
the ones who lit the fuse
and wound up
dead, injured, or lame
we solute you
the fallen founding fathers
of the freelance fireworks hall of fame
remember when jed
filled his pickup truck bed
for a big time that night
one cigarette out his window
led for one historical lightshow
and to me
a poetic way to die
but the best has got to be
bill’s ingenuity
with his man sized rocket, duck tape, and a lawn chair
well he did good i reckon
he flew a full eight seconds
without spilling one drop of his beer
this song is for
all our pyrotechnical heroes
risking undulation
all for detonation
they ignited the firestorm
now we fan the flame
and we solute you
the fallen founding fathers
of the freelance fireworks hall of fame

- rhett and link lyrics

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