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sparkaman – two identities lyrics

[verse 1]
she’s feeling confused, she feels like she’s locked in prison
parents don’t wanna let her out but she doesn’t listen
then she’s thinking “why do i always feel like i’m the victim?”
but it’s hard with a marj not born in britain
the lifestyle that she’s living has got her feeling lost
sat+rday she’s in the club and sunday morning in the mosque
so this life she’s living has got her feeling kinda f+cked
she wants to pack her bags and tell her dada that she’s had enough
she’s in the dumping ground but her name ain’t tracy beaker
her parents wanted her to study and become a teacher
when she’s looking in the mirror she don’t see ayesha
her dad beat her cause she just come back from shisha
she’s thinking “why am i the one to blame?”
this is who i am and i don’t really wanna f+cking change
when she’s with her friends she tries to cover up the pain
the kinda life she’s living’s got her mom and dad feeling ashamed

[hook]
i don’t really know who i really am
i’m looking in the mirror but i feel like
i feel like someone else
feel like someone else
i don’t have a choice
i just wanna get away and live my life with you
[verse 2]
you can guess what’s next, she met a boy she liked
her life was dark but when she saw him she saw the light
she’s thinking in her head that all her friends are telling porky pies
cah they’re tryna tell her “you should allow him cah there’s more to life”
she’s thinking that they’re jealous so she tells her friends to do one
they’re telling her that they ain’t worth it, you’ve just gotta move on
now it’s him and her, they’re thinking “can it work?”
now it feels like it’s them against the f+cking world
linking undercover every single day after college
he’s telling her “it’s me and you for life, yeah i promise”
nothing’s gonna break us cah me and you are solid
yeah it’s just mad how her dad never spotted
feeling panicky, she’s in agony
thinking to herself that “my parents will be mad at me”
her boyfriend can’t take it any more so he’s getting on his knees and asking “will you marry me?”

[verse 3]
she’s engaged with him cah he’s the one she wants to settle with
she’s thinking that this thing is better hid
daddy’s telling her “you’re marrying a relative”
she’s thinking to herself “i can’t take it, will i ever live?”
the anger’s raging in her so she tells her fam to p+ss off
now she’s witnessing her family having loads of kick+offs
now she wants to get away cause she’s feeling sick of
her dad telling her “you’ve always gotta wear a hijab”
she don’t know what to think
she wants to keep her family happy but she wants him
the situation’s getting sticky, yeah it’s getting grim
she’s looking to the sky and asking allah to forgive her sins
her feelings getting put away
the thought of marrying her cousin’s got her feeling grey
she packs her bags and tells her dad that “imma run away”
she looks upon her man and then she starts to live another day
[hook]
i don’t really know who i really am
i’m looking in the mirror but i feel like
i feel like someone else
feel like someone else
i don’t have a choice
i just wanna get away and live my life with you

- sparkaman lyrics

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