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the beards – the beard lyrics

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they called him the beard
and he walked here and there
they called him the beard
because of his facial hair
and when he walked through the town
all the people would cheer
they’d say look at that guy
he’s got a really good beard

they called him the beard
and he give to the poor
protector of the innocent
upholding the law
the women would blow kisses
the beardless men would frown
but his name was the beard
and he ruled the town
but the beardless men gathered
said enough is enough
he’s got such a good beard
all we grow is bumfluff
he’s taking our women
putting us all to shame
so a plot was then hatched
the beard would be framed
he was found and arrested
and sentenced and trailed
the jury was rigged
he was sentenced to die
the beardless they gathered
and led him away
to hang, at noon, that day

[sax solo]

the beard stood at the gallows
a noose round his throat
but a bullet was fired
it severed the rope
and then hundreds of men
suddenly appeared
riding on horseback
with thick healthy beards
and the beard and his brothers
they ransacked the town
they slaughtered the locals
they burnt the place down
so if there’s a lesson
in this to be learned
it’s don’t mess with the bearded
unless you wanna get burned
by a man they called the beeeeeeaaaaaaard
beards



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