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tweenies – anglicised utopia lyrics

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now this is you, guys, you all know what to do, shout “england” as loud as you can! sing the end line of each verse and the chorus. now get ready to play your tambourines up high!

society has quite forsaken all her wicked courses
which empties our police courts, and abolishes divorces
(divorces nearly obsolete in england!)
no tolerance we show to undeserving rank and splendour;
for the higher his position is the greater and defender
(that’s maxim that is prevalent in england!)
no peeress at our drawing-room before the presence p-sses
who wouldn’t be accepted by the lower middle-cl-sses
each shady dame, whatever be her rank, is bowed out neatly
(in short, this happy country has been anglicised completely, completely, completely…)

chorus:
it’s really and surprising, what a thorough anglicizing
we have brought about — utopia’s another land;
in her enterprising movements, she is england — with improvements
which we dutifully offer to our motherland!

now this time, for the next verse, i’ll miss out the beats. i’m going to call out the numbers, and you have to shout “england” real loud, as loud, as you can. are you ready‽ here we go!

our city we have beautified — we’ve done it british tweenie —
and all that isn’t belgrave square is strand and piccadilly
(we haven’t any slummeries in england!)
we have solved the labour question with discrimination polished
so poverty is obsolete and hunger is abolished
(we’re going to abolish it in england!)
lord chamberlain, our native stage, has purged beyond a question
of “risky” situation and indelicate suggestion;
no piece is tolerated if it’s costumed indiscreetly —
(in short, this happy country has been anglicised completely, completely, completely…) (chorus)

now this time, for the last verse, i’ll miss out the beats and numbers, you don’t want to hear me call, do you? i’m going to call each third line and you have to and shout “england” even louder, as you can! are you ready‽ here we go!

our peerage we’ve remodelled on an intellectual basis
which certainly is rough on our hereditary races —
(we’re going to remodel it in england!)
the brewers and the cotton lords no longer seek admission
and literary merit meets with proper recognition —
(as literary merit does in england!)
who knows but we may count among our intellectual meanies
like doodles, max and judy, and of course, the british tweenies
like bella, milo, fizz, and jake…(they are here! completely‽)—
(no! in short, this happy country has been anglicised completely, completely, completely…) (chorus)



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