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xlmb – dear dad lyrics

i don’t know where to start
i guess in your absence you didn’t mean for me to fall apart
well
things change and i’ve learned some things too
like what it takes to be a man and how it wasn’t you
d-mn
i’m not mad i’m just sad at how things fell through
but above all, there can’t be another you so

i wish you would call
but then again i’m scared you’re gonna let loose
and i’m gonna fall
the same way that you let my mother do
but you say it’s not your fault
come on this weight is heavy and we gotta make through
cause i’m tired of being the one to clean up all the residue
tell me when you’re growing up
so i know who to look to
cause i’m not trying to fall
i’m really looking for guidance so
tell me you’re the one i can call
im tired of empty promises and overdue letters
you can try your best but if it isn’t better
then ill pack your name away and only visit in the winter
i really hate to be this way but you’ve made me bitter
i use to watch what i would say but now i’ve got no filter

all that time went by, you were sitting behind them bars and i would just cry
“mom why can’t he go with me? why does he have to stay here?”
little did i know, you’d spend most of your days here
alone
only talking to the phone
but that doesn’t ease the pain when your heart has turned to stone
and i still call you dad when i talk about you to other people
the only hurt i get is trying to figure out if i should use your legal
like “yeah my dad is locked away in prison oh i mean brian is gone, but you don’t have to listen”
it’s another only child with another only parent
and i’m pretty sure i’m not the only one that’s tearing
apart at the seams, it seems that i have to come clean
all that time you were away, i was away chasing dreams
i really couldn’t wait for you
but i had to go to those extremes
i mean
come on dad, i had to fight the statistic
that says children with only one parent will never make a difference
well
they got the wrong one
i won’t stop until i’m done
i’m coming with no interference
all it takes is persistence
i wish i felt your existence
but that won’t ever happen when it takes two to walk the distance
yeah
“so many things that i don’t understand
like why am i so lost if i have a captain?
i’m tossed back and forth by deceitful winds
and if it all falls look within”

- xlmb lyrics

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