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zdoggmd – doctors today lyrics

[intro]
e, r, si (?)

[verse 1 + zdoggmd]
it’s been a really really messed up week
7 days admittin’, 7 swing shifts
at least a patient gave these brownies to me
then i remembered she’s demented—with a nasty case of c. diff

[pre+chorus 1 + zdoggmd, both]
la, la, la
these ain’t brownies
la, la, la
despite the nuts
la, la, la
i’m signin’ out, yo!
la, la, la

[chorus 1 + zdoggmd]
‘cause it’s the last patient today, hurray!
and i’m fillin’ out his discharge papers as he turns to say
“by the way, i really can’t move my right side”
i prayed he was just jokin’
but the ct shows he’s strokin’
what the hеy, i’ll just stay, pushin’ tpa
[verse 2 + dr. harry]
well my clinic day was crazy too
ten kids that werе wheezers, 40 that were criers
my exam room reeked of stinky poo
junior stole my stickers, then he set my tie on fire

[pre+chorus 2 + dr. harry, both]
la, la, la
oh well
la, la, la
it’s just a phase
la, la, la
you need a time out, son
la, la, la

[chorus 2 + dr. harry]
in my clinic today, today
billy ate his action figures, there’s a yoda in his belly
today, no way!
there’s another kid who claims that she was peed on by r. kelly (what?!)
now johnny’s coughin’ on me, and it turns out he’s got tb
gotta say, there’s no way, i’ll get home today

[post+chorus + zdoggmd, both]

all the nurses now
whoa, whoa!
and the pharmacists
whoa, whoa!
even the dentists
[refrain + zdoggmd, dr. harry]
it just don’t stop, old folks they get up
old folks they sundown whenever they want
i give haldol to stop them from fallin’
hear the code called, it’s torsades de pointes!
babies chokin’, ten year olds smokin’
kid threw up all over my face
i can’t find this little boy’s heartbeat
think he’s from an alien race

[bridge + zdoggmd, dr. harry, both]
it’s you and me and we’re healin’ this town and
no pencil+pusher’s gonna push us around and
urine is yellow, but feces is brown and
what was our point?

whoa!
we love it!
whoa!
it’s the bomb, yo!
whoa!
even the paperwork
whoa!
no, dude. no

[chorus 3 + zdoggmd, dr. harry, both]
we’re doctors today, today
and we drown in body fluids from both young and old
and it may sound cliche
but it’s still the greatest job in the whole wide world
gimme my inh, i’ll take it
c. diff brownies? heck, i’ll bake it
can’t you see, we’d work for free
if we won the lottery
we’re doctors today, today
we’re doctors today, today
by the way, one more story…
(no, no, you don’t have to, man…)

[verse 3 + dr. harry]
i saw this surly teenage dude
looked more like he was forty and he said he had an “owie”
and he kinda looked just…like…you
with a huge sore on his pee pee

[pre+chorus 3 + zdoggmd, both]
la, la, la
whatever
la, la, la
it wasn’t me, dude
la, la, la
why does it still burn??!?
la, la, la

[outro + zdoggmd, both]
i’m the last patient today, today
zdoggmd
last patient today, today
dr. harry
last patient today, today
mad love to healthcare peeps everywhere!
last patient today, today
and we out…

- zdoggmd lyrics

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